I used to think that the mark of a functioning adult is capability, a person that is, or at least expected to be, relentlessly able. I was led, or lead myself, to believe that this ability was built outside of my mistakes, that you suddenly arrived at your 21st birthday, into a life free of ‘mistakes’. For many years I painted my self-portraits with the blood of my mistakes and achieved nothing. This heart-aching pursuit of perfection is the very mistake you spend your time trying to avoid. Most of us have heard of the infamous A-B-C’s that arise accompanied by the never-ending melody we would sing loud and proud throughout our primary schooling. The adult A-B-C’s go a little differently, they are a reassurance for your decision making.
If I was to tell you the A-B-C’s had now fundamentally changed, you must start with A, skip past B and arrive at C anyway, you would probably look at me funny. Although logically we know that isn’t the natural order of things, we tend to prioritize the…